Self-criticism. We can be our our own harshest voice. Perhaps you’ve been equally guilt of pushing yourself beyond hunger and energy, or have said words to yourself that are incredibly cruel. The speed in which we call ourselves names that we wouldn’t accept or verbalise to others is quite astounding.

If you are almost about to collapse in a pile on the floor, then you’re not alone. It's not uncommon for us to hold a harsh inner dialogue or act aggressively towards oneself while trying to push through things. It's also worth knowing, however, that an unhealthy or harsh attitude toward ourselves can create stress, problems, and anxiety. Putting ourselves down or 'punishing ourselves' can make us feel unworthy, and our energy and joy become drained and exhausted when we push ourselves too hard. It’s totally unsustainable.

It is widely believed by many people that harsh self-talk motivates people to make changes and to excel, but studies have shown just the opposite happens. People lose motivation and initiative when they continuously engage in self-limiting or destructive thought processes.

Self-compassion and kindness lead to more perseverance, initiative, and productivity, whereas self-criticism and kindness lead to a reduction in both. Our relationships with others improve when we become kind to ourselves as well as more resilient to challenges and stress.